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Truth and Lies in Therapy

by Steven Lazarus

Have you ever showed up for therapy session intending to lie to your therapist?  Most people will say that they have not, but studies show that over half the people who visit a psychologist in Littleton actually tell lies to their therapist!  Why does this happen and what is it doing to your therapy sessions? Read on to find out more!

Some Surprising Statistics
Research scientists have found that lots of people actually don’t tell the truth in therapy. Instead, they tell lies, misrepresent the truth, or otherwise avoid talking about what really happens! Most people admit that they have done this at least once, and some admit to doing it multiple times. In individual therapy, this can greatly delay progress; in couples therapy, it can be a disaster.

Why We Lie

People lie for all sorts of reasons—to therapists, to family and friends, and otherwise. Some people tell lies because they are ashamed of the truth, others do so because they wish it were the truth. Lying serves an important role in protecting ourselves from the judgment of others, but most importantly, it serves a role in protecting us from the judgment of ourselves. In married couples, lying can cause major relationship problems , but does not always start off that way—even little white lies can grow out of control.

What it Means

Is it “bad” to lie in therapy? One way to look at it is to consider that, since therapy is about your own self-discovery and change process, lying to your therapist is a lot like lying to yourself. You may be able to pull it off temporarily, but will it really be worth it? You know the “real” truth, so perhaps a better question than judging “right or wrong” is to explore why lies happen, what they are protecting, and how else you can deal with these feelings. If you want to get the most out of your therapy experience , answering these questions—and yes, talking about them with your psychologist—can help!

Everyone wishes they performed to their highest standards at all times… but when reality sinks in, you may find yourself avoiding that truth. Instead, contact a trusted psychologist in Highlands Ranch to explore why you want to present yourself differently and work through these issues for better sessions!

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